The most difficult part of our regimen is unconditional forgiveness. Forgiving someone is difficult, especially if they show no remorse for something incredibly wrong or hurtful. Forgiveness is the final step to breaking the cycle of suffering. By holding on to the memories and pain of others actions you are fostering that pain in yourself. Unconditional forgiveness starts with self reflection, understanding deeply why you feel the way you do. Once you understand yourself you can begin to look at others’ actions objectively. You will begin to see the suffering in other people and how their actions are just a product of their pain.
Unconditional forgiveness is not saying the other person is right, it is not compromising your morals, or encouraging hurtful behavior. Unconditional forgiveness is seeing that someone is coming from a place of suffering, acknowledging their suffering, and not letting their suffering further affect your life.
Unconditional forgiveness is forgiveness without expecting something in return. You are not expecting an apology, or to even feel better about yourself. Unconditional forgiveness is done solely with the intention of breaking the cycle of suffering, and anything that comes as a byproduct is a happy surprise.
Finally, Unconditional forgiveness is not a one time action. It is part of the routine and process of recognizing your actions and how they affect others. Your Intentional Habits should guide you to acknowledging and forgiving your own suffering and the suffering of others. This forgiveness gives you clarity into others emotions and helps you better serve those you care about. By working to better serve others you are ending the cycle of suffering and nurturing a cycle of care.
